Rock Star Explained by a Retarded Person

​"No one cares about this 20 year old movie. Why don't you review something else?"
Because, I'm lazy and recently watched this for the first time. Plus, it's my website.

​​I just couldn't get into this movie. On tubi, it was marketed as the Ripper Owens story, but the closest it ever comes is guy from tribute band ends up in actual band.

The movie is about Razorfist, I mean, Marky Mark pretending he's super into heavy metal in the 80's. He has a tribute band and treats his bandmates like crap because he wants to be as good as Big Band. He is kicked out of Tribute Band because he's a dick and no one likes him. The next day, he gets a phone call from Big Band who says "Hey, you real good. Come be in Big Band." He is in Big Band and does crazy sex, drugs, and rock and roll things. His girlfriend dumps him. He sad boy.

He drowns sadness with more sex, drugs, and rock and roll, as you do. He realizes that the sexy time no longer make him happy. He also has no creative control in the band and realizes what an ass hole he was to Tribute Band. Then at the end of the movie Marky Mark moves to Seattle and becomes Pearl Jam lite. Then the credits roll and Good Vibrations by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch begins to play.

Does that sound like a completely generic plot to a movie? Yes? Good, because that's what I thought too. The movie was not at all interesting. Sure, the Ripper Owens story was still pretty fresh, but they could have at least tried to capture some semblance of that tale. The music was also totally generic and wasn't the least bit catchy.

Airheads is a better movie than this. Airheads also has Lemmy. Airheads also has White Zombie. Airheads also has Brendan Fraser singing Reagan Youth's Degenerated. That's right, Marky Mark didn't even do his own singing.
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I guess the whole point of this article is that if you're thinking about watching Rock Star that you should probably just watch Airheads instead.