Film Review: Das Boot

Title: Das Boot
Release Year: 1981
Director: Wolfgang Petersen
Starring: Jürgen Prochnow

What's with the new Demise of Film format? Well, as anyone who has been reading Demise of Film since 2012 can tell you, this blog is written by an obviously retarded person. However, I would like it to appear less like that and perhaps it's written by a sophisticated film reviewer. Shhhh, don't tell anyone that you're all in on the joke. Anyway, on with the film review.

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Das Boot is a German movie that documents the lives of several Nazi Naval men aboard a submarine during World War II. That's it.

I can hear the groans now, "ugh, I don't like war movies. War is so bad man." Yes, I know war is bad, however, so does this movie. I really don't want to spoil too much, but this is a powerful war movie. I'm not usually a fan of war movies either. I think Saving Private Ryan is a masturbatory look at American soldiers and is one of the most overrated films of all time. I also think it completely ruined American action scenes for the next thirty years.

Das Boot is not Saving Private Ryan. It is a film that literally makes you care about Nazis. This is not hyperbole, this is fact. It doesn't dwell on terrible things Nazis did like a lot of American films do, it dwells on the fact that they were people, just like any of us. Have you seen Boy in the Striped Pajamas about the German kid and the Jewish kid who become best friends? Yeah, it's like that.

I love the score for this film. It was composed by Klaus Doldinger and I'm 90% certain he just recycled this score when he Neverending Story. Don't believe me?

The thing I absolutely love about this film were the sets and miniatures that were created. I love how the cinematographer and the cast had to become so familiar with the set that they would run drills through it.

This movie reminded of all the reasons I love movies. The crazy sets, the crazy actors, the crazy directors. Did I not mention the crazy director? He didn't want the cast in the sun while filming so they would look as pale as they would if they were really aboard a submarine.

I love how wretched everyone looks by the end of the movie. These bright faced young men come back looking as if they were really put through the wringer.

You know how a lot of people love praising Saving Private Ryan for shooting everything chronologically? Yeah, Das Boot did it first. Don't be like me and sleep on this fantastic movie. I thought it was a war movie about German dudes on a submarine. This is a movie about people and the hell war inflicts upon them.