Hey everyone, sorry I haven't been in touch lately, I've been kinda busy with everything else in my life. I've been looking over Keeping Justice to make sure everything is in place for when I get the animation and the music and I still really like the movie. I'm sure a few of you have been wondering if I'm having an existential crisis, due to some of the shit that has been posted on twitter. Let me confirm, this is not an existential crisis, this is a getting back to my roots. Since 2013 it feels like so much has changed while simultaneously nothing has changed.
I started using social media to market my films because I didn't know what else to do. I wasn't sure how to market my films outside of that. I got involved with the film community on there and they're all just the most pretentious of pricks. They're always going on and on about the newest movies coming out and why they're the best movies ever and how they want to make films just like them. This is a big reason why I put my 20 years rule in effect.
Do you remember when the indie industry was happy being the indie industry? I do. I remember when independent filmmakers used the independent banner to get away with stuff that big studios were too afraid to gamble on. Now the indie community wants to turn out the same garbage as Hollywood, it's sickening. I've stated before that I prefer the metal community over the film community but I don't think I ever went into detail as to why.
Whenever I've hung out with metal dudes, I always feel at home. I never had the anxiety of upsetting someone or committing some faux pas, it always felt like home to me. I always expected to find the film industry to be as accepting but that never happened. It was a world of backstabbing, underhandedness, hypocrisy, and lies. The film world was not where I wanted to be.
This is what I'm talking about when I talk about getting back to my roots. See, when I was in a band, I'd invite people I knew to my shows. Granted, most of them wouldn't turn out, but a few of them did. I would chat with these people afterwards and hang out with them. This is what I want to do with my films. I want to show them in a theater and invite everyone I can out to see them so I can spread the word. I want to try something different with everything.
I've tried doing things the way all these other film people do them and I really haven't made any progress other than that fact that I've made more movies than they have. I want to take a different approach, my rocker approach. The people who have been the most supportive are from the music industry, I guess it's just where I'm supposed to go.
I decided long ago that I don't want to stop making films, it's definitely something I love. Just dealing with the politics of the film industry is sickening to me and it's not something I want to deal with. I just need to get back to my roots, it may take some time but I have confidence that I'll get there.
Okay, so I don't think I've talked about Keeping Justice for quite some time, on the website anyway. I mention stuff here and there on twitter, gab and occasionally facebook but those are small details; when you want the big fish you check in on DecadesApartFilms.com. I think I've mentioned in the past that I'm trying to get some bands on the soundtrack for the film. I've now received permission from all of the artists to use their music. They've all been awesome about everything so I'd like to ask that you guys please give them support by picking up some music from them.
Elephant Gun Riot
As I said, they've all been really cool and I just think it would be really cool if you showed these great people some love.
In other news, Paco has sent over a few music samples to give me an idea for Keeping Justice's theme and I just wanted to share that with you guys.
Oh and I realized that I forgot to share a little of the animation segment that I keep talking about. You guys probably think I'm crazy, but no it's totally real.
I'm so excited to show this movie to the world, so many people have been seeing bits and pieces and they're all very excited. We've also recently received a very nice review for A Final Hit.
This is all stuff that's been going on while I've been away from the website. I don't want you guys to think that I've given up or I just don't care anymore, I just don't feel like updating as much as I did when I first started out. I remember back in 2013 when I was making Invisible Diary that I shared everything with you guys (the ups and the downs) but as time has gone on, I share less and less. Mostly because I want people to await the final product but also because my schedule has become so hectic that I no longer can update as much as I once did.
Anyway, if you've stuck around this long, here is a little cherry on top of the sundae of Keeping Justice updates: a small clip from Keeping Justice.
Have you ever just felt off your game? That's how I've been feeling lately. I just feel off my game lately. I'm going to finish Keeping Justice, of course I am. I've just been dealing with a lot lately and it's just a lot to process.
I just wanted to update you guys so you're not worried about me. I'm okay, just dealing with a lot. If you don't hear from me for a while, that's why.
Well, I got a job today, a normal every day job. Please do not congratulate me. I really wanted to run my own business and do my own thing, unfortunately, it didn't work out. I feel like I've failed. On top of this, I don't feel like finishing Keeping Justice. I'll finish it, of course, I just don't think I'll ever enjoy it.
Let's go back a few weeks. I started working with this guy who was going to help me get business going. I met with the guy and he had several good suggestions I tried to put into practice but nothing seemed to work out. He suggested I contact a local newspaper and a local radio station to promote Keeping Justice, I was game. I reached out to both sources and the newspaper is only interested once the movie comes out (which I'm not even sure when that's going to be right now since the animation has been delayed) and the radio says "sure, give us a copy of the movie." So I did.
The radio station watches the film and says they don't like it and besides that, they don't talk to filmmakers anyway. Then they ask to see the film when the music and animation sequence are finished. No. That is not how this works. You said you don't like it, nothing is going to change that. See, I thought Keeping Justice was really good, I think that's why I'm hurt.
I'm not hurt though. I just feel tired of jumping through hoops with these "industry people". I already know my films won't appeal to them because we make B-movies. I'm tired of telling people that I'm a filmmaker and that our films are listed on Amazon and I'm still not taken seriously. I'm tired of feeling that not even my family really gives a shit as to what I'm doing. I know it's me against the world but I thought that at some point I would have allies.
Maybe I would have allies if this wasn't the path I chose. If I actually picked something normal to do with my life. I have sacrificed so much on the altar of film, yet I feel I have nothing to show for it. I'm an outsider living in a world of insiders. I'm a nobody fighting like hell to be a somebody. I gambled on so much and I've only lost a lot.
That might be why I'm so attracted to Metal. It's the genre that feels like no matter who you are, you have a place where you belong. I get along with dudes in bands way more than film industry people. You know how watching interviews with Spielberg you get the feeling he's a douche bag? Now imagine a bunch of dudes like that and you get an average film set. I don't feel like I belong in their world.
I don't know what I'm talking about anymore. I feel I'm just saying stupid stuff. I don't think I'm going to give up. I know that film is a pain in the ass but it's still something I love, I just need to get away from the people that make me hate it.
Keeping Justice finished principal photography a few weeks ago. I've been editing it and working on sound, color, waiting for the stop motion work, then getting music. It's a lot of crap that I'm doing. We do have a poster though, done by Charlene Garcia. I'm so happy with it!
This needs to be said. Did you hear that Netflix is changing the rating system on their website? Coming in April they're going to be giving a thumbs up and thumbs down. Why? Because Amy Schumer did a bad comedy special. Wait, what? Let's see, NYT is blaming the Alt-Right, which I find absolutely hilarious. Look, if it was the Alt-Right, do you really think changing the rating system is going to help Amy Schumer? Look, none of that matters.
The sad thing is people are afraid of negative ratings lately. Kevin Smith went out a few years ago and said crap about critics. It's like everyone is living in this fucked up little world where everything is hunky dory. Don't believe me? Just google removing negative reviews. Why is this a thing? Why don't you listen to your detractors and see if they possibly have something to say that you could change to be more appealing?
Look, maybe it's because I'm adult and not a child, but I don't throw fits about negative reviews. I've had Battle Royale with Cheese rip me a new ass hole. I've also had Good Bad Flicks tear one of my films to shreds. Yet, here I am already telling them that I'm releasing a new film and I want both of them to review it. I'm not afraid of negative reviews because I'm much harsher to myself than they could ever be to me. Heck, I've even received a review on Amazon calling me out personally. It was pretty funny.
However, I would never hide these reviews because they're just people being honest. Honesty is something that seems to be missing from society. So many people pussyfoot around and don't say what they mean, I tell people exactly what I think of them. Sure, I get labeled a dick but we need dicks to go around and fuck all these pussies and assholes plaguing the planet right now (Team America reference).
Nothing you will ever say will ever bring me down. It's not because I'm beautiful. It's because I've already told myself worse than anything you can ever tell me.
I want to close this off by addressing our fans: Michelle, Keith, Blaine, Jack, Austin, Jason, Marco, and anyone who I don't know the name of. I want you to know that I love all of you and am so grateful for the support. However, I don't ever want any of you attacking my critics. They are the people that hate me but they're also the people that agree with how much I suck and make me want to better myself. If one day my critics side with me, I'll have to find new people to tear me apart.
That is the point of negative reviews. It's to tell you: "Hey, you messed up here." It's so you can fix it next time. It's not for you to act like a child and take your toys away. To all my detractors: I love you too because you're helping me grow. I may never be the next Kurosawa but your criticisms allow me to take the next step forward.